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The most interesting thing about fatherhood is the teacher/pupil relationship that a father and his son share. Not only do you get to watch a human being grow, learn, and experience the world but it’s your sole job to teach him how to be a man. How to be a man; those words carry a lot of weight because sometimes it’s unclear as to what that actually is. What exactly do you teach a young boy? What life lessons do you want to instill in him?
I have a son of my own and while I could rattle off 100 things I want to teach about being man, I know there is only a couple he will actually retain. I also remember how it was when my dad tried to teach me a life lessons and it wasn’t like the movies. I didn’t want to hear it. I was an arrogant teenager. But as much as I tried not to listen, in the back of my mind his words stuck like glue. “Don’t be follower, be a leader”. “There’s a time and a place for everything”. “I give your mother my everything, not because I want to spoil her but because I appreciate her”.
So if there were only five things I could teach my son before it’s too late, here’s what they would be:
How To Treat A Woman: You can explain to a boy until your blue in the face about how to be a gentleman and treat girls right. Will they really listen? I’m a strong believer that you should lead by example. While my son may never understand the complexities of how to treat a girl, he will see the way I treat his mother. If I love her, cherish her, and treat her as my equal what do you think will be the likely outcome when he gets older?
How To Appreciate Every Single Blessing That Comes Your Way: Some people go through life with an easy ride, some complain, others think that the universe actually revolves around them. Being humble, appreciating what God has given you and understanding that you must work hard to get what you want in life is the key to success. I will make him work hard for every cent of his allowance money. Sometimes I will have to say “I’m not going to do that for you anymore, you have to learn how to do it for yourself”. I’ll show him integrity is doing the right thing even when no one else is looking.
How To Enjoy Life: It might seem simple, but it’s one of the most profound statements ever made: “All work and no play make a dull person”. If you’re going to work hard then you need to play hard. In life everything must come with a balance. Nobody wants to be a robot and focus solely on their work. When he least expects it, we’ll blow caution to the wind. We’ll skip an event and blow money at the video arcade. We’ll drink root beer out of champagne glasses in our underwear. We’ll burp when we’re not supposed to, speak our own dad/son language, and drive six hours on a whim just to catch a Saints game.
Help Him Understand Who He Is And Where He Came From: We’ve all come across people who are trying to find themselves. People who grow up and all of sudden get confused about who they are as a person. To some that can be detrimental and they wind up taking on an identity that isn’t truly their own. My son will understand who his family is and what his ancestors did so that he could live in a free world. He’ll know that skin color does not define him but his character will. If he understands who he is and where he comes from the world can tell him no different.
How To Man Up: You might have heard this before: “You need to man up, brah”. Each person can interpret this differently but the simple explanation is that you need to be a man, nothing else. So what does being a man entail? It means that you own up to your responsibilities, when you’re wrong, admit it and learn from your mistakes. It means you must be tough sometimes and compassionate other times. It means that it’s okay to cry and okay to feel vulnerable. Remember you need to be a man, not Superman. You are strong whether you realize it or not.
By Chris, Founder of NewOrleansTech.Net
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